Since I can't do anything else right now, I figure I'll continue populating this thing...that way, if I ever get an audience, there will be stuff to read (and to my one current reader, and the inspiration for this whole sad attempt at humor and self-inflicted therapy, I hope you're enjoying it).
Two more little ditties to share, since it's just one of those friggin days.
When in doubt, cry first, then try...
First, I made one of my "junior" colleagues cry. I felt bad about it too, until I replayed the event in my head. I was having a major personal life-type argument on the phone when this deer in headlights IM'd me asking if I had a minute. I didn't respond. 45 seconds later, another blinky window, which I opened to see IM #2 "R U there?" (because apparently the extra four letters that would have made actual WORDS were too much for her little fingers to type)...again, I ignore. 2 minutes later, still in a heated phone battle, she calls me (I don't answer). Finally, 5-6 minutes later, I finish (lose) my battle, and go to see what she needs. Start out by politely apologizing for the delay and explaining that I was on an important call, to which she responds (in a whiny little voice) "but I need your help." I told her I was there now and that I would try to solve her problems in a courteous manner and asked what was the matter. She told me she thought the Internet was "broken" (I've got many more stories about this, but will save those for future editions). I asked her what the bloody hell she was talking about and was told that our company's website wasn't working. Having been on the site during my phone fight, I already sensed this was headed down a dangerous path and asked her to show me...she hadn't even finished typing when I diagnosed the problem - she was spelling our company's name wrong. I tried to stay calm and did well, until she whined a pathetic, child like "thaaaaaaank yooooooou" at me, at which point I lost it...said I was happy to help when there are legit problems, but that I had real work to do and can't come to the rescue every time she does something dumb. I politely requested that the next time there's a "weird problem," she pull her head out of her ass and try to solve it herself before crying to me...she started crying and now I feel like a jerk. If someone laughs at this story, it will make me feel better.
#2: I don't know what annoys me more, stupid people or people who say dumb things trying to sound smart...
Just got a new client (yippee!!!!) with some pretty cool technology. We have a big meeting with them in about an hour, which is great since I can't do anything productive anyway. One of the "boss types" who's "overseeing" the program has decided he likes what they do (or at least his interpretation of what they do) and wants to be involved...no good can EVER come out of this. Before I could even protest, he had started doing his "research" and emailing the rest of us (and yes, he has heard all about my trials and tribulations with email today...now closing in on 8 hours) "recommended reading material" about the competition and the market. I saw the emails coming in, and could swear I actually heard laughter coming from my computer when I clicked to open one of the messages, right before that little virtual middle finger reared its ugly head again. I asked another member of the team to print the stuff for me, and she happily obliged. When she brought it to me, she said she wasn't sure if all the stuff was appropriate. I didn't even have to get past the first page before I realized these printouts would be more useful to wipe my bum with than to read. His emails, explaining how we mis-read the situation, were just about as absurd as the supporting documentation. It took me 45 minutes to explain why every bit of his research was wrong, and for us to agree that he'll sit quietly at the meeting and let me sound smart.
I had nothing better to do anyway.
Bye for now
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