Sometimes technology causes stupidity...

Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately), nothing good happened at work today. A few "tutorials" on different tech subjects (IPTV, 700MHz, EDGE vs. GSM vs. HSDPA...almost all intelligent questions). The only thing I could think about was a story of stupidity from the good doctor himself. A story not where stupidity results in the misuse of technology, but one where an obsession with all things gadget-y causes temporary stupidity. For anyone brave enough to read this crap (or smart enough to scroll), there are a couple of stories at the end...of course, I think my own techno-stupidity is amusing too...

I'm moving soon. My house is sold, I have a closing date and my almost ex-wife is planning her move to a place far far away from me (free at last, FREE AT LAST). She's already started packing, while I've started looking for new "stuff" for my soon to be bachelor pad as I think about escaping the suburban semi-hell (not sure if it's considered purgatory...) I've been living in for the last 5 years of my life. I've literally done hours of research and have made a lot of progress. I've picked a TV (52" of Samsung LCD 1080P goodness), have narrowed my sound system down to 3 finalists, and have a preliminary plan in place for my wireless network (despite the fact that I'll have an apartment slightly bigger than my bed, I'll have 3 computers with me...one for everyday use, one as a set top box / DVR permanently hooked up to that beautiful TV and the third to function as a media server, streaming music (Sirius online and MP3s) to the stereo and video (illegally downloaded movies mainly) to the laptop that's connected to the TV. I've also started looking at furniture...picked out a mattress, have 3 bedroom sets and 2 living room sets on the short list, and starting to narrow down my kitchen options (cookware, knives, etc. - in addition to being a raging geek, I'm also an aspiring gourmet).

Of course, it hit me a little while ago that all this planning is for naught, as I haven't yet started looking for an apartment to put all this crap in, and chances are whatever I end up with will have enough room for about a third of what I've already picked out.

I suppose I'll chalk this up to a temporary lapse in better judgment caused by a raging geek-gasm. Assuming I can find a place to live, it's gonna be hooked up (forgot to mention, I found a KILLER deal on that 52" Sammy...saving enough to stock the bar for the housewarming party and pick up a PS3 for some Blu-Ray goodness afterwards).

Enough about me...most of you (ok, both of you) are here for the funny stories about stupid people, so here's a couple quickies before the muscle relaxers kick in and I pass out...

Now-former colleague, a sweet girl, but not the brightest bulb in the chandelier, calls me upset that she can't get a certain website to load. she says she's typed it about 10 times, tried copying and pasting, and it still doesn't work. I ask her what it says and she tells me nothing, except the website she's trying to visit. I walk over to her office to see that she didn't have her browser open and was typing it in the wrong place. On her screen was a word document with a web address typed over and over again (probably about 20 times). On the bright side, she had hit return so each one was hyperlinked. In an effort to make her feel smart, I told her to hold down control (and then had to rephrase and tell her to hold down CTRL, or "kuh-tarl") while clicking one of the blue sentences. It worked and she was able to go shopping.

Colleage calls me over because she's trying to listen to a webcast and the sound is muffled, despite the fact that she has the volume turned all the way up. She claimed to have heard something, so it couldn't have been any of the usual - volume off, speakers powered down, speakers unplugged. I went over to take a look, unplugged her headphones from the jack built into the speaker and everyone in a ~20 foot radius got to hear a quick snippet of her "webcast," which sounded strangely similar to Walk Like an Egyptian by the Bangles.

Another colleague calls me to ask if I can figure out why her sound is "messed up" - in the background, I hear what sounds like multiple audio tracks running at the same time. I go into her office and explain to her that if she has the YouTube video playing at the same time as the client webcast and the VH1 Internet radio, she'll hear all three simultaneously, which would explain why her sound was "messed up." The YouTube video (LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE!!!!!) finished playing, so it was down to 2 sources. To the surprise of no one in the room, she stopped the client presentation and kept VH1 running.